Rush Too Far Page 23
She let out a sigh, and her shoulders slumped. “I’m fine. I need to go to the kitchen and see if I even still have a job. I was warned by Woods this morning that something like this might happen and it would be my fault. So right now, I have bigger problems than you suddenly feeling the need to be possessive of me. Which is ridiculous. Because you were doing your best to ignore me until this incident happened. You either know me or you don’t, Rush. Pick a team.” She jerked her hand from mine and started toward the kitchen again. She was mad because I had ignored her? I had watched her every move, dammit.
“You were working. What did you want me to do?” I asked her. She stopped, and I took my chance to defend my actions. “Acknowledging you would have given Nan reason to attack you. I was protecting you.”
Blaire’s shoulders sagged. “You’re right, Rush. You ignoring me would keep Nan from attacking me. I’m just the girl you f**ked the past two nights. All things considered, I’m not that special. I’m one of many.” Then she ran from me.
I stood there, frozen, so damn confused. The sound of the doors slamming echoed down the hallway. She was hurt. I had been doing what I thought she wanted me to do, and I’d hurt her.
Did she really think she was just some girl I fucked? God, how could she not see what she meant to me? I was so completely obsessed with her that she controlled every decision I made. What the hell did she expect from me? I loved her, dammit!
CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX
Nan came stalking out of the ballroom. Her eyes found me standing there alone, and the fury I knew was boiling under the surface exploded. “How could you do this to me?” she demanded. “This was my night. I just needed you to ignore her for one night, and you couldn’t do it. Not even for an hour!”
“Just stop,” I said, holding my hand up. I wasn’t ready for this. I had to find Blaire.
“Don’t tell me to stop. You humiliated me in there. You threatened my friend, a member of this club, because a server was clumsy!”
I took a step toward Nan. “Laney dumped that tray on her. You know it. Paris saw it. Bethy saw it. Do not correct me.”
Footsteps interrupted me before I could say anything more. I turned to see Blaire, still covered in that crap, looking like she wanted to crawl into the nearest hole. She hurried away toward the door leading outside.
“Blaire, wait,” I called after her. I had to talk to her.
“Let her go, Rush,” Nan demanded.
“I can’t,” I replied, and took off running after Blaire.
The door closed behind Blaire, but I shoved it open and followed her out.
“Blaire, please wait. Talk to me,” I begged.
She stopped walking, and I caught up to her. She was giving me a chance.
“I’m sorry, but you’re wrong. I didn’t ignore you in there. Go ask anyone. My eyes never left you. If there was any question in anyone’s mind how I felt about you, the fact that I couldn’t look away from you while you walked around that room should have answered it.” I had to say this right. I couldn’t f**k this up. I needed her to understand how I felt. “Then I saw the look on your face when you saw Bethy with Jace. Something inside me was ripped open. I didn’t know what you were thinking, but I knew you had realized the wrongness of tonight. You should have never been there serving anyone. You should have been by my side. I wanted you beside me. I was strung so damn tight waiting for anyone to make a wrong move toward you that I forgot to breathe most of the time.”
My gaze fell to her clenched fists at her sides. I hated seeing her like this. I ran my finger over her hand.
“If you can forgive me, I promise this will never happen again. I love Nan. But I’m done trying to please her. She’s my sister, but she has some issues she needs to work out. I’ve told her that I’m going to talk to you about everything. There are some things you need to know.” I hadn’t meant to say that, but I had to. I was going to lose her if I didn’t tell her now. I would tell her I loved her first. I wanted her to know that. “I’m dealing with the fact that you may walk away from me once you know them and never look back. It scares the hell out of me. I don’t know what this is that is going on between us, but from the moment I laid eyes on you, I knew you were going to change my world. I was terrified. The more I watched you, the more you drew me in. I couldn’t get close enough.”
“OK,” she said simply.
What did that mean? “OK?” I asked.
She nodded. “OK. If you actually want to keep me so badly that you’re willing to open up to me, then OK.”
A grin touched my lips. Damn, she always made me smile. “I just bared my soul to you, and all I get is an ‘OK’?” I asked.
“You said everything I needed to hear. I’m hooked now. You have me. What are you going to do with me?”
The relief that ran through me made my knees go weak. I had to keep my cool. I couldn’t scare her with my intensity. Hell, it scared me. “I’m thinking sex on the sixteenth hole by the lake would be nice.”
Blaire tilted her head to the side and acted like she was considering it. “Hmmm . . . problem is, I’m supposed to change and go work in the kitchen the rest of the night.”
Not what I wanted to hear. “Shit.”
She stepped closer to me and pressed a kiss to my jaw. “You have a sister to escort,” she said.
I wasn’t going to make it through tonight. “All I can think about is being inside you. Having you pressed close to me and hearing you make those sexy-ass little moans.”
Desire flickered in Blaire’s eyes as her pupils dilated.
I decided to keep talking, since she liked it. “If I could walk away from you easily, I’d take you into that office and press you up against the wall and bury myself deep inside. But I can’t have a quickie with you. You’re too damn addictive.”
Blaire’s hands were still on my shoulders. She squeezed them, and her breathing hitched.
“Go change. I’ll stand out here so I’m not tempted. Then I’ll walk you back to the kitchen,” I told her.
She took a deep breath, then stepped back and went in to change.
The temptation to go in there with her and make love to her before sending her back to work was hard to ignore. But she wanted to finish working tonight. It was important to her. I wanted to prove to her that what was important to her was important to me.
When she walked back out, she was wearing a clean cartgirl uniform and smiling at me.
“Sure you don’t want to take me back to the sixteenth hole? I promise I’ll be quick. Just let me lick your pu**y until you come.”
Blaire trembled and let out a shaky breath. “Rush, don’t say that. I can’t. I have to go back to work, and I don’t want Jimmy wondering why I’m a jumble of nerves.”
Smiling, I reached for her hand and threaded my fingers through hers. “You clean up well,” I told her teasingly.
Blaire giggled. “I sure smell better now, too,” she said.
I tugged her over to my side and ducked my head to inhale her. “You always smell amazing, sweet Blaire.”
She leaned into me, and I moved my hand to tuck her beside me as I walked her back into the building and to the kitchen door.
“I’m gonna kiss you. I know you’re at work, but right now, I just don’t care. I need to taste you.” I leaned down to press my lips against hers. I licked her bottom lip, pulled it into my mouth and sucked, then let it go with a reluctant peck.
Blaire shot me one last grin before leaving me standing there without her.
Going through the motions and finishing the night had been hell. But I’d made it, and Nan seemed happy. She chatted on the way back to the house about a shopping trip she wanted to take with Paris and asked if I had talked to Mom lately.
When Nan had driven away I let out a sigh of relief and went inside the house. Blaire would be home soon, and I was still giving her that massage. She more than needed it now. She’d been going all damn day.
I walked through the kitchen on my way to the stairs. The empty bottle of beer and the wineglass sitting on the bar stopped me in my tracks. At that moment, the world felt like it had ceased spinning and I was moving in slow motion toward the glass.
Familiar red lipstick on the glass made my stomach turn. Fuck, no. Not yet. God, not yet. I needed tonight. Motherfucker. I needed one more night. She wasn’t ready. I had to plan this. Shit!
I headed for the stairs and took them two at a time, needing to see for myself. As I walked down the hall, I saw that the door to my mother’s room was closed. They were in there. I knew they were. That door was normally open. I didn’t touch the door. I was afraid to see them. I was afraid they would destroy this. They would tell her everything and send her away from me.
No.
God, no.
No, no, no.
She didn’t come home for hours. I didn’t know how many; I just knew it was late. I had been sitting outside my door on the floor, waiting for her. Staring straight ahead. Needing to see her and hold her and know she was here with me. She wasn’t gone.
The sound of the front door opening sent my heart into a wild frenzy. Blaire was home. This could be it. The end. No. No. No. I wouldn’t allow it. I would make her love me. Make her forgive me.
When she stopped on the top step and saw me, I sat there and took her in. My sweet Blaire. She had shown up and stolen a piece of my heart without opening her mouth. Then she’d consumed me. Taken it all. I had let her have it freely.
She started walking toward me, and I stood up and went to her. “I need you upstairs. Now.” The desperation in my voice seemed to surprise her, but she didn’t question me.
I grabbed her hand and pulled her toward my door. I had to hurry and get her tucked safely into my room. Away from them. I tugged her inside and closed the door, before turning to her and pressing her against the wall.
I ran my hands down her body, memorizing each curve. It wasn’t enough. I needed the clothes off. Grabbing the front of the shirt she was wearing, I ripped it open. I didn’t have time for buttons. She gasped, and I covered her mouth with mine. I stabbed her sweet warmth with my tongue over and over, while I made quick work of the snap of her shorts and jerked them down her legs. She was na**d. My Blaire. My perfect, sweet Blaire.
Growling against her mouth, I knew I needed more. She wasn’t leaving me. I couldn’t let her leave me. I pushed her back onto the steps and jerked her shoes off, then pulled her shorts and panties the rest of the way off. Completely na**d. Just for me to see. No one else. Ever. Just for me.
Falling to my knees, I pushed her legs apart and ran my tongue up her slit, lapping at the cl*tthat was already swollen and ready for me. Blaire cried out my name and fell back on her elbows. Her thighs fell open more as I slid my tongue inside her, before running it along the tender folds again. My name was a chant on her lips. I began kissing the soft skin of her thighs, and she trembled with needy whimpers.
“Mine. This is mine.” Lifting my head, I looked at her. “Mine. This sweet pu**y is mine, Blaire.” It was mine.
She shuddered as I pressed my finger inside her heat.
“Tell me it’s mine,” I demanded.
She nodded as I slipped my finger further inside her.
“Tell me it’s mine,” I repeated.
“It’s yours. Now, please, Rush, f**k me,” she said, panting.
Yes! That was my girl. Yes, she was mine. She needed to know she was mine. This was mine. Standing up, I jerked down the pajama pants I’d been wearing and kicked them aside. “No condom tonight. I’ll pull out. I just need to feel all of you,” I told her.
I would never put a condom between us again. I never wanted to be separated from her. Grabbing her thighs, I moved her up as I shifted down and lined my c**k up with her entrance. I couldn’t slam into her if she was sore. God, she had to be so damn tired, but I had to have her. Slowly, I moved inside her.
“Does it hurt?” I asked, holding myself over her.
“It feels good,” she said with a sigh.
I was going to hurt her. I stopped and pulled out. “These stairs are too hard for you. Come here.”
I picked her up in my arms and carried her up the stairs. She was too fragile tonight to press against the hard wooden stairs.
“Will you do something for me?” I asked her, peppering kisses on her nose and eyelids while I stood beside my bed.
“Yes,” she replied.
I set her down on the floor and held on to her, even after her feet touched the rug. “Bend over and lay your chest flat on the bed. Put your hands over your head, and leave your ass stuck up in the air.”
I had fantasized about seeing her this way. She didn’t ask why or argue. She simply did it. Knowing she wanted to please me so easily made the panic grow. She was it for me. She had to know that.
I ran my hand over the round, smooth ass that she so willingly presented to me. “You have the most perfect ass I’ve ever seen,” I told her as I caressed it. Taking a firm hold of her h*ps and moving her legs farther apart, I entered her in one thrust.
“Rush!” Blaire cried out.
“Fuck, I’m deep.” I groaned, and my eyes rolled back in my head. Better than I had imagined. It was always more with her. Always f**king more.
I began pumping inside her. She pressed back against me and grabbed handfuls of sheets as she made loud moans and pleas for more.
Hearing her pleasure made me push harder. I couldn’t get deep enough. I wanted to live in here. Locked inside her. The tight suction grabbed my cock, making my knees buckle. I was close. Reaching down between her legs, I slid my hand over her pussy. “God, you’re soaking wet.”