I have to fight the urge to smile, covering my mouth and pretend-coughing. "No, I didn't."

"So, he thinks you're fucking available?" Jas looks like he's about to break something.

"Well, am I not?" I hiss in response, throwing the covers off me and getting out of bed, too. I'm still naked, and I can feel Jas' eyes devouring me as I storm out of the room.

He catches up fast, grabbing me by the hand and pulling me against him as he growls, "Don't walk away from me."

"What should I have told him, Jasper?" I demand. "That I'm single?"

"You're not fucking single."

"Then what? Am I your girlfriend? Your lover? Will there ever be some sort of title to our relationship? Is it even a relationship?"

He hesitates, and the moment is long enough for me to tear myself free of his grip. I storm off, hating him more than I ever have. He races behind me and tries to grab me again. I don't let him hold on, and I rip myself out of his reach.

"Just stop it, Jas. Enough."

"Enough of what?"

"This... bullshit!" I run my fingers through my hair in frustration. "You're acting like you own me, but you won't even call me your girlfriend. What kind of man traps a woman, not letting her meet other people but won’t give whatever we have a title?"

"The kind that isn't letting you walk away from this." He backs me up into a corner and my back flattens against the wall. "You're mine, Petal, whether you admit it or not."

"All you've done so far is give me whiplash.”

"And make your wildest fantasies come true." He smirks. I don't need the fucking reminder and he knows as well as I do, if he reached between my legs right now, his fingers would get wet. "Fight it all you want, but you're obsessed with me, too."

"I'm not," I murmur.

"Oh, you are. You can't help it."

I roll my eyes. I don't want to argue with Jasper again, but he's getting on my last nerve.

"Maybe I should leave you be for a while," he says thoughtfully. "Let you deal with your own problems. You need to learn how to take better care of yourself, anyway."

My breathing catches. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Maybe you should go on a date with Bill," he delivers the punch, making my heart and my head hurt. "Maybe it would be better for you to date a normal, regular guy."

"But..." I don't finish my sentence. Jas heads back into the bedroom and I follow in his footsteps, shaking all over. I want to hurt him. Scratch him. At the same time, I want to beg him to stay, to keep me, but I'm too afraid to so much as open my mouth.

I watch silently as he pulls on his jeans, and then looks over to me, saying. “Maybe it’s time to end the fantasy. It wouldn’t have lasted anyway."

Those times I was thrown out from my foster homes play in a loop at the back of my head, then the times my last two boyfriends broke up me, then all the times anyone and anything I cared about abandoned me.

Something snaps inside me then, and I lose it.

"You fucking jerk! How can you say that to me? How can you fucking abandon me, you monster? You're just like everyone else! Just like everyone who's left me!" I approach him and start slamming my fists against his chest, cursing him out, screaming at the top of my voice. "I hate you, Jas, I'll never forgive you, never forget this, you sick bastard!"

Jasper does his best to stop me, but when it doesn't work, he simply grabs me and throws me over his shoulder. "If you're not going to calm down right now, I'm going to force you in the shower and hose you down, Petal."

It only makes me crazier, and when I'm kicking him, my foot lands right in his crotch. Jasper groans, and though he must be in excruciating pain, he still sets me down softly, trying to make sure I'm okay before holding his bulge and cursing out loud.

"Fuck me, you've got a kick on you, Pet."

I launch myself at him again, but this time, he tries to calm me down with soft whispers, his voice just as soothing as his touch. He runs his hands over my hair to make me feel better, but it only makes me angrier. I thought that one snap would be it, but it keeps happening, and I keep breaking, falling apart over and over again.

I'm sobbing, and I collapse on the floor with tears flooding my vision. "Just go, Jasper, just go, please, just let me go."

"No." His answer is firm as he kneels next to me. "I'm making sure you're okay."

I can't stop crying, and I can't stop my instincts either. Unfortunately, my body is convinced Jas is out to hurt me, to abandon me like everyone else, and I start kicking him again, screaming, scratching. My long nails dig into his skin and he curses out loud as I continue my vicious attack.

"Petal, calm down. It's all going to be okay," he tells me in his calmest voice. "I'm here, baby, I'm here." He pulls me against him, flattening my arms against my body and holding me so tight I can barely move a limb. Strangely, feeling restricted like that helps. It means I don't have to worry about protecting myself – Jas has got that part down pat.

"I hate you," I get out through sobs.

"I know you do, Pet, I know you do." We're sitting on the floor, with Jas' back against the door and me shaking and trembling in his arms. "You don't have to hate me, though. But you can if it helps, okay? I'm here to make it better, Petal. See? I'm already making it better."

He's right. I've stopped resisting him, though the sobs are still racking through my body.

"Can you see how I'm helping?" he asks, and I nod. His arms tighten around me in a constricting hug. I don't know how he's doing this, but the cloud slowly seeps away. "Look how much better it feels when you let me help, Petal. Just relax, okay? Sink into this. Let me hold you."

He forces my arms down for the umpteenth time and I let him, a giggle ripping from my lips amid all the sobs. It doesn't escape Jasper's notice, and he kisses the top of my head before gently going on, trying to calm me down.

"That's a good girl, Pet, you're being so good. You're going to start feeling even better now. Almost back to normal. Almost back there. You feel it?"

"I feel i-it," I stutter, my voice painfully hoarse from all the crying.

"Good girl. It was just an anxiety attack. We can deal with those."

The way he says we makes my heart soar, but the memories of the rest of the night are still too sore in my head. I push him away and stumble when I pick myself up. Jas reaches for me, but I shake my head, signaling that I'm fine. He rises to his feet too, keeping a safe distance from me, probably in case I attack him again.

"You're the only one who's ever managed to calm me down after an anxiety attack," I mutter.

"Really? What about your parents?" he wonders out loud.

Instantly, my expression is replaced by a grimace and I motion for him not to go there.

"Sorry, Petal."

"It's fine." I sigh, my voice still broken and my throat sore from the crying. "Jas, I need you to leave."

"I don't want to leave when you're feeling like this."

"I'll be fine," I promise him. "I've dealt with it plenty of times before. Thanks for your help, but I can handle it from here."