Be My Brayshaw Page 2

I knew and appreciated quickly no one would bother with a bitchy blonde mess with winged eyeliner and red lips, not when prissiness and perfection and mirrored personalities were so sickeningly desired.

Now, though, being who I convinced myself I wanted to be when I first arrived here took an effort I didn’t even want to give.

Living the loner life was no longer appealing.

Realizing this was like granite to the face.

It was only days into hiding myself that I started to grow restless and couldn’t stay away, no matter how hard I tried.

That’s when I knew for sure there was no going back. I’ve always had self-control, but it seems to have slipped.

What started out as righting wrongs I’d helped create, turned into more and without permission.

My little wonder grew to want, want morphed into need, and there was no going back from there.

Possibility bloomed, grew richer roots, and clawed its way into the ground around me.

I couldn’t stay away, so I compromised with my own damn mind, and it was back to hiding in plain sight, like before.

Like now.

But Raven called. She’s home, and very unlike Captain.

He looks for me, scans the yard when he passes the girls’ home, and I have no doubt he’d stop if he spotted me, which is why I made sure he didn’t.

He’s patient, or he forces himself to be anyway.

Raven is the complete opposite.

She’ll get out, walk right inside the group home and drag my ass out the door herself, if even just to hang out on the porch after she did it.

My cheeks fill with air as I attempt to calm my nerves.

Out of everything—knowing who attacked Raven when she was young, the news of my being there when it happened, the truth about Donley being both our biological fathers, Raven’s mom being a complete fucking psychopath, and everything in between—this is where my real fear lies.

This is the part I’ve dreaded the most, the disclosure of a secret so devastatingly complicated.

“Standing in the shadows again?”

The sultry, crisp voice wraps around my ribs and squeezes the air from my lungs. My heart beats double-time as I spin.

Messy blond hair, clear blue-green eyes, and a small side grin, Captain stares.

Shit.

Twigs snap beneath his feet as he comes closer, the crack of each one spiking my pulse higher.

My spine straightens, and I shuffle backward until my shoulder blades meet the tree I tucked myself into, allowing no room for an escape should I need one.

“Hi,” I manage to force out after a long moment.

The corner of his mouth slowly lifts higher, his gaze roaming across my face as if he’s refreshing his memory of me, and my teeth clench tight.

“Hi,” he mimics. “Why you hidin’ in my orchards?”

“Maybell told me Raven was home,” I say.

He nods, humor lining his features. “She tell you this today, or a week ago?”

“What?” Shit.

A low chuckle leaves him, and he takes another step forward, his chest now brushing mine.

“You thought I didn’t notice?” His words are a slow whisper. “That I’d let you keep hiding in the shadows, watching?”

Shit. Shit.

Captain’s eyes fall to my lips when my tongue sneaks out to wet them.

“You’ve been avoiding me,” he accuses, his stare flying back to mine. “Why?”

“I haven’t,” I lie.

“You’re lying.”

It’s what I do...

“Captain—” I bite back my words when he jerks in even more.

His hand finds my neck, and he uses his thumb to help lift my chin where he wants it, his lips now only a breath away from mine, thick and full and so, so tempting.

“You laid in my bed, touched me in your sleep,” he rasps, the blue in his eyes darkening, almost covering the green completely. “Dreamt out loud.” A slow smirk appears, and his tone drops to a playful roughness that stirs deep in my stomach. “That was my favorite part.”

I swallow, my body growing lax against the tree.

I should push him away.

He stands perfectly still for several seconds before he says, “This is the part where you tell me to kiss you, sleeping beauty.”

I frown, my palms flying forward to plant against his pecs, fully intending to shove him back, but my body betrays me, my hands not doing as I willed and instead pull him in.

Greedy, heated lips fall on mine and I forget how wrong this is of me, my mouth answering his tongue’s demand and opening farther.

Anything for him, my subconscious screams.

His teeth lightly scrape the skin of my bottom lip, forcing a low groan from deep within his chest, and he pulls back when I’m positive this was him having not even started.

He tilts his head to the side, a heavy, rasped chuckle escaping.

“I knew it,” he confesses, his tongue peeking out to tease the corner of his mouth.

I clear my throat, officially dazed. “Knew what?”

“You want me,” he states with confidence, drawing back, but only by an inch, and his knuckles skim down my neck. “Same way I want you.” His eyes find mine again, a calm command front and center. “Say it.”

Reality slams back into place, pulling at my muscles until I can hardly breathe.

What did I just do?

We’ve had a simmering attraction for weeks, months even, but it’s never been spoken of.

We’ve talked, but not about anything outside of what we’ve needed to.

We’ve hung out, but never alone, except for the night at the Brayshaw cabin, when Raven married Maddoc.

Neither of us could sleep, and we both ended up out on the balcony looking up at the stars and old sugar pine trees. It was comfortable, the silence we sat in, so when he said he was going to watch a movie, I took that as an invitation and followed him to his room.

I did sleep in his bed.

I didn’t realize I touched him, and while I have been known to talk in my sleep, he never mentioned it. Not that he had a chance.

Like he said, I’d been avoiding him, but not for the reasons he’s thinking or one he’d ever guess.

I swallow, shaking my head as I answer his question in a copout way.

“I hardly know you.” The lie is easy, the truth that follows even more so. “And you don’t know me at all.”

Captain isn’t deterred. His gaze is sharp, focused, and sure. “But you want to know me, like I need to know you.”

My body warms.

Like he needs...

The soothing heat quickly shifts to a burning flame, and I dig my nails into my thighs. “You won’t like what you find.”

“I like enough already, and I’m not asking you to tell me all your secrets, yet… even though you already know my biggest one.”

Fuck.

He keeps going, a hint of a smile on his lips. “You’ve been out here every day, Beauty. You’ve seen her, my daughter.”

My jaw clenches tight and I consider lying for the hell of it, but he saw me, right? I have no bar to balance on, no rope to grip.

This is it.

I knew it was coming, it’s why I delayed as long as I could.

This is it.

I give a jerky nod.

“You want to meet her?”

My brows slam together, the hope in his eyes causing my stomach to turn.

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